Last week it seemed as if everything was upside down in the NFL. This week, things seemed to take a more familiar feel - with several notable exceptions. The friggin Colts were one of the major exceptions to the rule this week, and I learned a valuable lesson...
Just Win Baby - Ugly or Not!
After blowing 4th quarter leads in 3 of 5 games, the Raiders found themselves with a stellar opportunity to repeat this 5 year long obsession with suckiness on Sunday. I am sorry that I did not have my phone with me during the game because a work colleague and fellow intelligent Raider fan was texting me about all the ways that we were going to lose the game. His premonitions about prevent victory defense, lame offense, penalties, and the like were all spot on. The Raiders played to form all the way! Let's review:
- 3 offside penalties in a row
- 4 false starts BY ONE GUY
- Dropped interception that hits you in the numbers (1st rnd bust Huff)
- Ineffective offense
- Stupid coaching that calls a time out as the opposing kicker misses the kick that sends it to OT
If that was not enough, the Raiders lost the flip in OT, but Brett Favre was not able to muster his magic from the night his dad died. Sorry, Brett - tossing up junk can't get you to the promised land every time! NY had this fantasy offense that they thought would rule the day, but did you notice that no balls went deep that were caught by Jets? their only deep ball was caught by DeAngelo Hall! Nnamdi Asomough has had like 8 passes thrown his was ALL SEASON! He may not make the pro bowl because there are no highlights because he is TOO GOOD!
Anyway, my favorite part was the 2 sacks put up by rookie Trevor Scott. He made some awesome moves from the outside - looking good. If the Raiders had an actual offense we might be halfway good!
Chargers Return To Form
I know that I have a few Charger fans that read this blog, primarily out of morbid curiosity. Even these fans are wondering - are we for real? Is all the sunshine that Nick Canepa blew up our ass this summer true? It seems it is not. 7 games in and less than one full game ahead of the Raiders - P U ! After looking good against a New England team that was out of sorts (based on Monday's performance), they sucked hard in Buffalo. Let me remind you short memory'd Charger fans that the Raiders also went to Buffalo this year and lost at the last second on a field goal. We led for 59:59 - hmmm...
I am wondering when the rest of you Charger fans will come to accept what I have been telling you here for nearly a year - LT is OVER! If any of you can point to a game where he gained over 50 yards in the first half, I would like to hear about it. He is over the hill, done, over. The whole toe thing is him just milking his contract and the Dolts front office trying to keep seat sales up. One little injury to Rivers and the Charger offense is gone....
I hate Mannings
I wisely put 16 on the Bills, but foolishly put 15 on the shoulders of one Peyton "I love Skants" Manning. It is hard to overestimate my hatred for him because even though I have heaped disdain for him on many occasions in these fair columns, he still plagues me. As soon as I am confident that he is done and gone and stop betting on him, he prospers. Now, after a few weeks of betting against him, he rolls in to Brett-less Green Bay and lays an egg. Fu@#&ck him!
Beers
I am a little upset at Anheuser Busch these days. For months they have done this tease for the new Bud American Ale. Today I even saw a "Coming Soon" sticker at the local 7-11. What the fuck is this? If you want to sell me a beer, give me the beer! Let me drink it! I can understand marketing a movie that people will only go to see once and you want them all there on Opening Night in this way, but if you are looking for me to drink 10 or 20 of these a week, you are just pissing me off by saying that you will have this great beer for me in September but make me wait 6 or 8 weeks more to try it! At this point I am sufficiently pissed to say that this beer sucks no matter what!
Beer drinkers may not be exclusively male, but the vast majority don't want tease ads unless there are strippers involved.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Week 6 - Its an Upside Down World - with special bonus feature - Pat sings Highway Star!
What the heck happened last week? Its as if the entire league went nuts all in the same week! Only the Raiders played with consistency last week - consistently bad that is!
Chargers/Pats
What can you say about this game other than WTF? After looking like total losers in Miami, the Dolts come back and stick it to the Pats like they were the Lions! Cassell is truly a backup - heck, these are the first starts he has ever had - ever. Not in college - not since HIgh School. Lame.
The Bolts looked good- amazingly enough. Rivers is somehow overcoming his bad passing mechanics and weak arm to actually look good. I have never seen someone have so much success with underthrown ducks!
WTF Happened in the NFC Last Week?
Lets review:
Browns Beat Giants
Cards beat Cowboys
Rams beat Redskins
Who would have thunk that any of this would happen? I took it in the shorts on my picks because of these "locks". I guess that's why they play the game.
Raiders Suck - Continued
Lame, Lame, Lame. Drew Brees passed for like a million yards in this woeful effort on the Raiders part. The DBs did OK but they got dink and dunked to death by Brees. Ugly. Friggin Jamarcus needs to get his head on straight and soon as this whole sack and fumble bit is getting old.
If only Al would just die already!
Beers
This week's beers section is not so much about beer itself, but what happens after you have had a few. Following a Charger game a few weeks ago, neighbors Pat and Andy were over with their kids and we decided to play a little Rock Band. Pat had shown an uncanny ability to hit the high note on Highway Star late one night last summer, so we decided to reprise his performance for the kids. Sheri grabbed the camera and the result follows - enjoy!
Chargers/Pats
What can you say about this game other than WTF? After looking like total losers in Miami, the Dolts come back and stick it to the Pats like they were the Lions! Cassell is truly a backup - heck, these are the first starts he has ever had - ever. Not in college - not since HIgh School. Lame.
The Bolts looked good- amazingly enough. Rivers is somehow overcoming his bad passing mechanics and weak arm to actually look good. I have never seen someone have so much success with underthrown ducks!
WTF Happened in the NFC Last Week?
Lets review:
Browns Beat Giants
Cards beat Cowboys
Rams beat Redskins
Who would have thunk that any of this would happen? I took it in the shorts on my picks because of these "locks". I guess that's why they play the game.
Raiders Suck - Continued
Lame, Lame, Lame. Drew Brees passed for like a million yards in this woeful effort on the Raiders part. The DBs did OK but they got dink and dunked to death by Brees. Ugly. Friggin Jamarcus needs to get his head on straight and soon as this whole sack and fumble bit is getting old.
If only Al would just die already!
Beers
This week's beers section is not so much about beer itself, but what happens after you have had a few. Following a Charger game a few weeks ago, neighbors Pat and Andy were over with their kids and we decided to play a little Rock Band. Pat had shown an uncanny ability to hit the high note on Highway Star late one night last summer, so we decided to reprise his performance for the kids. Sheri grabbed the camera and the result follows - enjoy!
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Week 5 - Of Cider and Men
Sorry for the late issue this week, gentle readers. Just did not get around to this until today! Since I was gone fishing last week I did not consume as much football as usual, but I can assure you that I kept the standard in the beer category!
Bushed
So Reggie Bush runs back TWO punts for TDs and the Saints still lose? At home?? I thought that the Saints were supposed to have this high flying offense? Drew Brees ranked high in all the pundits lists didn't he? Well, apart from Reggie's two TDs they only managed 13 points! I read a report that another pundit expected Drew to have a big passing game against the Raiders this week, but we'll see. I'll put the Raiders secondary up against any team in the league. We'll see what happens!
The Colts Are Done
Thank God for this! Sure, they won this last week, but barely and they are 2-2. I hate Peyton Manning, his father, his brother, and even people named Manning who are not even related to them. Why can't he just get a Theisman and be done with? My only fear with this line of thought would be that were he disabled and taken out of the league, he would just appear in the broadcast booth as a ubiquitous a-hole in my face. I don't know which would be worse. Perhaps someone could sack him and crush his larynx or something.... that ought to do it!
Sitting on the Dock on a Lake
As I indicated earlier, I did not get to watch much football last weekend, but I did catch the Charger game. I was sitting on a dock at Gull Lake, over 7000 feet up in the Sierras enjoying some cold beer and views that were unbelievable. My buddy Mark has a Sprint phone with the NFL package so we were able to listen to any game right on his phone. It was my pleasure to listen to the Charger Homer announcers cringe as the Bolts failed again. I could not see LT pout or limp around, but the images were in my head anyway. That guy is becoming an anchor for the Bolts. Even if he is better at some point, I assure you that he will have lost that little edge that he had to be one half step ahead. Its over for LT.
Sunday night is a big game for you Charger fans. We'll see what team shows up. The only player the Bolts have that is meeting the expectations for him is Rivers so far, but now who will he throw to? Chambers is out. Gates is a mere shadow of himself. I guess that leaves Jackson, hmmm. I think that the Pats only need to play their B game to win this one!
Cider
My younger brother Robert is a self styled master homebrewer. His beers have won many awards in beer competition and since he stopped putting fruit in his beer they are actually quite good. Anyway, while he was not on our trip to the Sierras, he did send along some home brew, a porter and some cider. One of my friends, RIch, who does not drink a lot of beer like the rest of us, exclaimed one night that the Cider was tasty and would be easier on his stomach that gives him gas. He then proceeded to drink a shitload of the stuff, apparently not knowing that home brewed cider has a massive alcohol content.
Rich got shitfaced, and then proceeded to spend half the night and a good part of the morning puking his guts out. I have never seen a guy so hung over! This reminded me of the time a number of years ago when my wife and I tried that Atkins diet - you know, the one with only meat and vegetables. Sounded OK to me - steak for dinner, steak and eggs for breakfast, etc! The only problem was NO BEER. I was forced to move to gin and diet tonic to avoid the carbs. THe problem is that 10 beers is very different than 10 gin and tonics (large ones of course) and I had some of the most massive hangovers and headaches that I have ever had.
I guess those of us who are used to beer know the old saying coined by Country Dick Montana - "Beer Ain't Drinkin'".
Bushed
So Reggie Bush runs back TWO punts for TDs and the Saints still lose? At home?? I thought that the Saints were supposed to have this high flying offense? Drew Brees ranked high in all the pundits lists didn't he? Well, apart from Reggie's two TDs they only managed 13 points! I read a report that another pundit expected Drew to have a big passing game against the Raiders this week, but we'll see. I'll put the Raiders secondary up against any team in the league. We'll see what happens!
The Colts Are Done
Thank God for this! Sure, they won this last week, but barely and they are 2-2. I hate Peyton Manning, his father, his brother, and even people named Manning who are not even related to them. Why can't he just get a Theisman and be done with? My only fear with this line of thought would be that were he disabled and taken out of the league, he would just appear in the broadcast booth as a ubiquitous a-hole in my face. I don't know which would be worse. Perhaps someone could sack him and crush his larynx or something.... that ought to do it!
Sitting on the Dock on a Lake
As I indicated earlier, I did not get to watch much football last weekend, but I did catch the Charger game. I was sitting on a dock at Gull Lake, over 7000 feet up in the Sierras enjoying some cold beer and views that were unbelievable. My buddy Mark has a Sprint phone with the NFL package so we were able to listen to any game right on his phone. It was my pleasure to listen to the Charger Homer announcers cringe as the Bolts failed again. I could not see LT pout or limp around, but the images were in my head anyway. That guy is becoming an anchor for the Bolts. Even if he is better at some point, I assure you that he will have lost that little edge that he had to be one half step ahead. Its over for LT.
Sunday night is a big game for you Charger fans. We'll see what team shows up. The only player the Bolts have that is meeting the expectations for him is Rivers so far, but now who will he throw to? Chambers is out. Gates is a mere shadow of himself. I guess that leaves Jackson, hmmm. I think that the Pats only need to play their B game to win this one!
Cider
My younger brother Robert is a self styled master homebrewer. His beers have won many awards in beer competition and since he stopped putting fruit in his beer they are actually quite good. Anyway, while he was not on our trip to the Sierras, he did send along some home brew, a porter and some cider. One of my friends, RIch, who does not drink a lot of beer like the rest of us, exclaimed one night that the Cider was tasty and would be easier on his stomach that gives him gas. He then proceeded to drink a shitload of the stuff, apparently not knowing that home brewed cider has a massive alcohol content.
Rich got shitfaced, and then proceeded to spend half the night and a good part of the morning puking his guts out. I have never seen a guy so hung over! This reminded me of the time a number of years ago when my wife and I tried that Atkins diet - you know, the one with only meat and vegetables. Sounded OK to me - steak for dinner, steak and eggs for breakfast, etc! The only problem was NO BEER. I was forced to move to gin and diet tonic to avoid the carbs. THe problem is that 10 beers is very different than 10 gin and tonics (large ones of course) and I had some of the most massive hangovers and headaches that I have ever had.
I guess those of us who are used to beer know the old saying coined by Country Dick Montana - "Beer Ain't Drinkin'".
Thursday, October 2, 2008
For 3 Minutes Less
Week Four is history and it was almost upside down week in the AFC West! This is going to be a short edition today as I am going fishing early tomorrow for four days in the Sierras! I will get right on to the ingurgitation of blackbirds....
10 In A Row
If only the Raiders could have called the game 3 minutes early! Handing a total asskicking to the Dolts for the first 3 quarters just to lose at the end was tough to take - again! At halftime the Chargers were looking like a high school team and the Chiefs had already beaten the Broncos! I was on Cloud 9! As it turns out though, simply claiming in the body of a text message that said message could not result in a jinx is not sufficient to avoid that jinx. The Raiders blew the lead in a familiar fashion, leaving what was a fantastic effort on the part of the defense in the mud.
LT got nearly half his yardage on the last TD play and was a non-factor. If he was not such a likable dork, I would hate him!
You got it Dolt fans - this time. Now its 54-31, so seven more years and you'll have the lead!
Al Davis
Must die. Even if he was right about Kiffin, the Silver and Black will not rise until he is out of the picture. Madden - please save us! Word is that Al has someone in mind to take over next year....
Smack Talk
it seems that while I hear the feedback verbally from people it seems that this effort reaches more than my eyes, it is clear that this forum is not the place to incite reactions from my gentle readers. Why is this so? I am not sure, but I was guided to the answer while reviewing the decorations on my office upon my return to work Wednesday.
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